The Lovesong Writer

This is a joke, Mr Liew called practice a relaxed one today. I was practically living with my heart in my mouth! I was tensed up:( aye, but anyway a fruitful journey to Parkway before that. At least I got something out of it. Well, that and a bloated stomach. HEHE XD

Let's do it again on Thrusday! WHEEEEEEEE!

Then back to school. Tsk. Don't even have time to rest? But anyway, I'm looking forward to getting my booklist for next year(: I saw the Physics book, it's this thick *signals with hands*. Whoaa... I can't wait to study it? Nah uh.

Something must be wrong with me. Tsk.

coming back down from the ride.

Labels: choir

7:10 pm;
Still waiting for you-

Somehow, I have this inate desire for heineken and sprite.

Labels: random spasms

10:18 pm;
Still waiting for you-

Some pictures from today!

YI XUAN(: isn't he just the cutest baby?

WHOOTS; the next Tiger Woods.

A darling ballerina(:

A candid shot(:

iknowit'ssillytobesad,butijustcan'thelpit.ididn'taskforthis.

Labels: debate, pictures

10:53 pm;
Still waiting for you-

The class party was held yesterday at Jacinta's house. I have to say I had a load of fun. Getting splashed by water, and then getting continuously pushed into the pool. And who could forget the many tears shed that night? Even though I didn't get to say it, I shall say it now: I shall always love this class, 2/4 of year 2006! We went through the whole lot together for this whole 2 years! A miracle that we didn't get sick of each other! We even found something to cry over as well!

I shall miss the good old times, when we would be scolded by the teachers. But the times we spent together shall be but a mere memory now that this chapter of our lives have been written, and even as we speak, a new chapter has begun. So we shouldn't cry over this. Just know that the times we spent together have been treasured. Be glad that we have helped each other grow in some way.

Okay, I'm being a hypocrite here! I know I will cry later on! Even if I don't cry now. I'll miss my class! I envy the Sec Ones for getting to stay with their classes for one more year! But I guess the hardest is to leave in Sec Four at graduation. Imagine that: leaving the school forever! Then moving onto a place devoid of familiar faces and warm greetings! That would be the hardest of all. And I know I will DEFINITELY cry then! But life comes and goes, I doubt that it would stop just to let us have our final moment. So we just gotta be content with what we have(:

a little vodka never hurt anyone.

Labels: musings, thanks alot(:

9:10 pm;
Still waiting for you-

WHOOTS!

The debate workshop today was funfunfun. Definitely worth missing class for. Haha! Not only are the instructors nice, they're funny too! What's more, there were lots of new friends to make.

There was this part in the workshop where we had to introduce ourselves using the formats learnt. Haha! I used the W5 (why?...where?...what?) plan, and guess what stupid little me said?

Me: I was born at 8 o'clock at East Shore Hospital
*pause*
Me: Why was I born?
*pause*
Me: I was born because my parents liked having fun.
*pause for a long moment**then everyone cracks up laughing*

Gosh, I'm glad that they didn't film that section. Imagine if that actually appeared on tv. My parents would have KILLED me. Well, after I said it I felt damn embarrassed lah. Haha. Anyway, they needed something other than the stereotypical type of greeting anyway. So perhaps that was a wake-up call for the drowsy minds? Haha. What I regret most is that I didn't get any contacts, most of the people I met were really nice.

Constructive criticism, new experiences. That's what I got. Thumbs up for that workshop. Perhaps I shall return for another one again(: anyone to follow?

Since you've left old friends behind, and gotten new ones. Just remember that we aren't even going to be in the same classes next year. As much as I try to resolve all differences by the end of the year, the strain of time and such have hindered me. Not to mention that you don't want to resolve it. Well, at least I'll be left with the fact that I tried my best. And what have you been left with? Wasted opportunities, lost time. Who knows? Perhaps you won't even be in the same class as me.

toblerone can teach us lots of things(:

Labels: debate

6:19 pm;
Still waiting for you-

Sigh. I love my deardeardear team(: they know how to cheer me up, how to make me laugh.

Congrats to them though! (Not to me, I sat there like a dumbass)

I thought the experience was really thrilling, and funny. I probably made a big fool out of myself on tv cause I couldn't stop laughing and screaming. So don't watch. I look ugly, haha!

Thanks to everyone for their support too! And their congrats, haha.

A list of what/who/where I love:
(counting down)
10. Going out with friends (oh yeah, we go crazy alright.)
9. Eating (yums!)
8. Singing (what's nicer than a good old fashioned campfire song with your friends?)
7. Laughing (of course!)
6. Making new friends (possible confidantes)
5. Friends like you! (i'm talking about you, YES YOU!)
4. Talking (non-stop chatter)
3. Argueing (what good of a debater am I without it?!)
2. Being lazy (like watching teevee and procrastinating)
1. The thrill of a job well done

And of course having said that, it's quite appropriate isn't it? Well then, no matter what happens next, we'll be happy. Not only for ourselves, but our friends too! Cause they're not stuck up like some people. And they're much nicer than some people. Okay, ignore the some people for now. But I'm sure most of us would agree though. Haha!

on to the show!

Labels: debate

10:40 pm;
Still waiting for you-

WE GOT IN!!!

Gosh, can anyone say yay?

Now it's time for more trainings and perhaps fun along the way too.

it'stimetomakenewfriendsagain!

Labels: debate

10:14 pm;
Still waiting for you-

Today just about sucked like hell. That's what you get for being a goody-two-shoes to attend choir. Well, that sucked too (cause I nearly fell asleep and got scolded two times).

Actually, you seem to realise who your real friends are after awhile. They're the ones that you laugh with, the ones that you cry with; the ones who are willing to listen, and the ones who you are willing to listen to.

That means that your true friends are your soft toys(: haha!

I remember the days where I used to cry to them and talk to them; even though they couldn't understand me at all. I still do actually, to a certain extent that is.

Being a debater and one who loves to argue, I can tell you this truthfully from deep inside my heart: I hate skirting around issues. If it's something I think needs to be raised, then I will raise it. Avoiding it only prolongs the inevitable, and avoiding it worsens the situation. Avoiding it is equalivent to running away, and running away is a coward's way out. That's what I learnt in life. Yes, running did seem appealing to me when trouble first start. But somewhere along the way, you just realise that it's not worth running anymore. Some people just aren't worth your time.

Then you come to the conclusion that you spend your whole life sifting through the sand, dividing who are worth your time and who aren't. It gets a little dull after doesn't it? That's why I've always felt that you can rely on no one but yourself.

And: LAI XUELI! I ENVY YOU SO!

i won't say the things you wanna hear.

Labels: bored, musings

9:36 pm;
Still waiting for you-

Oh!

I got my tie and blazer today(: too bad I think it's too big for me. LOL. (No, I'm not a prefect. Neither do I wish to be either. LOL.)

Career talk was a pretty boring event. I slept and slept and slept through it. Except the Straits Times and the Consultant one. Yup, then had debate. Finally, no debate tomorrow(:

yeah, go do what you will.

i'm beginning to question the meaning of friendship.

Labels: debate

9:32 pm;
Still waiting for you-

OH GOSH!

After hours of break back and work (well, not really). I've finally finished the stupid speech. But I still need to time and pace myself:( well, that's a load of rubbish. Just need to remember not to talk too fast.

I can truly say that I'm satisfied with my results today(: no, I'm not for maths. But I'm pretty satisfied overall. Looks like a bright future ahead (yet again).

I don't really give a damn anymore. Do what you shall, I doubt that all your fake friends will support you. In the end, you lost your supposedly best friend. That's too bad then. It's time to start a new chapter in my life.

i just don't know anymore.

Labels: results

10:39 pm;
Still waiting for you-

We braved the haze to go to Sentosa. It was pretty funny, we met at Tanah Merah at 9.30, but got separated in the end (me and Cheryl took the first train while Xueli and Daphne took the second train). That was interesting. Then we took "breakfast" at 7-eleven at Palawan Beach and then we got on the luge. The luge was funnn(: we sat on each other on the way up, screamed the way down. And did it all over again. HAHA. Then we walked at Siloso Beach before lunching at Sakae (where I took the premium plate without realising).

Then we went back to the main island to see Vivo City. Where we played at Toys R Us and shoed at the "High End" stores. Daphne is crazy about the pair at Ted Bakers. HAHA. Then we walked and walked and walked until our legs were tired and went home. The MRT was crowded :( but I had a fun time(: now it's back to reality (prepping):).

we'll be dancing in the moonlight,

and you'll be smiling back at me.

Labels: outoutout

7:40 pm;
Still waiting for you-

We musn't forget those others who have birthdays too!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO:

12th Oct - Lai Xueli aka Bunny/Rabbit
14th Oct - Heidi Foo
16th Oct - Joey Chan aka the Kangeroo
22nd Oct - Cheryl Low aka Mao

You may think since it's my birthday and all, I wouldn't be wishing other people happy birthdays too right? WRONG! In fact, I'm going to my dear darling baby cousin's house later to give him my present. Even though his birthday was like September 27.

But then again, Sentosa tomorrow to celebrate ALL our birthdays(:

Labels: happy birthday

4:07 pm;
Still waiting for you-

Announcement:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! I'M FOURTEEN NOW!!!

Labels: happy birthday

3:00 pm;
Still waiting for you-

I'm boreddddddddd! I just ended my TV marathon cause it got too boring to watch. Now what do I do?

Labels: bored

10:46 pm;
Still waiting for you-

EXAMS ARE OVER! YAY!

It's heartbreaking! My wallet is leaking. Slowly and lethally. Sorry girl, no money for shopping tomorrow. How saddening! I can't wait for the weekend to be over, for after the weekend I shall be (hopefully) un-broke.

I know I should be happy that exams are over, but somehow, I'm feeling just a tad bit blue. Of all the opportunities presented to me to be happy, I choose to be sad. Why though, why? A thousand and one thoughts fill my head like a speeding expressway. It's definitely not money problems, nor is it exams. Perhpas, just perhaps, a tiny bit of friendship? But sometimes I myself really do wonder why.

But then again, I'm being petty. Friendships should be there. As clear as crystal, as straight as an arrow. But I wonder about deception and lies, do we really know them like we do? We think we know them but in the end, it's all but a distant memory. We seem to be drifting apart and it's something I don't want. Even though it seems as though we're fine, I get the feeling that we're not. Have we gone through these years to have our friendship crumble like all other friendships? Maybe it's just me, maybe I'm just imagining things. Say whatever you like, I'm insecure, I'm selfish, I'm petty. Whatever. I don't really give a damn anymore.

There's always something every year to make me feel sad near my birthday anyway.

sing a new song. it's a new beginning.

Labels: BROKE

7:12 pm;
Still waiting for you-

WOOOO. I only have my final piece left to complete(: and I feel exhilirated! Not to mention the big 1-4 is coming up this saturday! Somehow, I can't pick up the book to practise for Chinese orals no less, but then again, who can?

I feel as if my streak for Maths has been ruined): well, I guess it wasn't that perfect to begin with. Apparently, I only take mid-terms and finals seriously. LOL. So sue me, I still feel the sting of it all anyway.

But then again, all this moping around (which I haven't done any since Friday) have reaped its benefits. For one, I went into a depressed/pour-your-feelings-out writing mood almost immediately and created a story using imaginary characters based on people I meet in everyday life. Apparently, it's really hot now to keep a blog of your 'inspirations'. I'm not going to do that anytime soon, and even if I did, it'd be under a pen name. At least now I know what I'll be doing when I'm bored: putting this story down into paper of course!

Excerpt:

She stared at the couple from a distance.

'They look so much like a couple.'
'They aren't.'
'They would be once they stopped skirting around their feelings for each other.'
'I wished they wouldn't.'
'You know they would.'

She sighed. They would. Her gut feeling told her that they would, though her brain denied it. How his warm brown eyes played her so! He made her feel loved and wanted. But why does he still love her in the end? She who is constantly surrounded by love and friends, she who is the very epitome of love itself. She should be the one getting his attention, she was the one who deserved it! It wasn't fair!

With one last glance at the couple, she fled. It was time to take matters into her own hands, she decided.

this haze, it feels like fog.

maybe you can tell, i'm not exactly affected by it.

Labels: bouts of inspiration

11:40 am;
Still waiting for you-

The best thing in life is to find out you're never alone and that you're loved.

It's something I found out today.

Even if I was anti-social, depressed, dejected, and cold; you all still continued to ask after me. And even got to the root of the problem. Well, not the root but a cause that sparked off the root anyway(:

And so I'd like to thank you all for being there for me in my moment's doubt of insecurity. Even if I'm annoyed by you sometimes, I'd do the same thing back for you in a heartbeat. Even though I may not have seemed affected by your questions, you all really did cheer me up by your constant worrying(:

Thanks alot.

Labels: thanks alot(:

11:17 am;
Still waiting for you-

I know I must have blown Maths. Insufficient time to complete it. All I can do now is hope for the best. I hope it won't cause a hindrance to myself. If I don't get in, I won't cry but I will feel extremely sad though. Inhuman really. But if there was no other choice, then I guess I would have to accept.

But enough mopping around. There's another paper tomorrow to try to score anyway.

We can only move forward by our own determination, and boy am I determined.

It seems as if everything I've strived so hard for was just taken away from me just like that. The important thing right now which seemed so close was just snatched up just like that. There's a sinking feeling in my stomach, telling me that I blew it.

there's no such thing as coincidence, only inevitability.

Labels: results

1:43 pm;
Still waiting for you-